Thursday, June 23, 2011

How do you Cope?

By no means am I an expert at dealing with the curve balls that life throws at you but I was talking with a couple friends about this and it got me to thinking.

Many of my friends, working and non working, will relax with a glass of wine, or some of them smoke.  I often see Facebook posts of women frustrated/exhausted with all of the things going on in their world and I wonder what it is that gets them past their frustrations. How do they cope?  Is it with wine, knitting, gardening, writing, verbal diarrhea to a friend, sex?  Its easy to get through life if you have good healthy coping mechanisms. It also helps if those same mechanisms stick around all your life.

I am Irish and have always shut down verbally (unless forced :)) when things are not going my way.  It is difficult for me to discuss things.  So to "cope" with this personality flaw, I have always coped with wine and writing out problems.  If things get out of control and I just need to escape and relax I go and grab a glass of wine and sit with a journal or piece of paper.  Now not in a raging alcoholic kinda way at all... just as a way to stop, sit and relax, escape or think about the situations at hand.  It a way it helps me regroup. 

What are some of the things you do when things get tough or do not go your way??  How do you cope?

1 comment:

  1. Well, as you know Kimmy I am quite the talker so I would say that my biggest coping mechanism is to process things outloud, with my husband or a friend I trust. I find a lot of relief getting it out there and getting validation first, and then being open to problem solving from them. What has also been a big gift to give to myself is self-validation. If I am having trouble with something I don't judge it---I just give myself permission to feel instead of being mean to myself on top of it.
    I also in the past year got into meditation and that has been a HUGE source of strength for me as a coping skill. It's amazing what some abdominal breathing and being present in the moment can do to get some mental space from whatever is taking over and I can practice it anywhere-anytime. Lastly, what I try to do for my general well-being and coping is to get outside to play at least 1 time a week--if that's a walk with the pooches, taking a hike, gardening, whatever just to reconnect with nature...